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Confessions of an MBA Turned Mama

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Today as I was chewing the fingernail of my 15-month-old while he was passed out in my arms, I started to laugh hysterically (okay, well, the hysterical part was more in my head than out loud).

I was thinking about how I would have judged anyone who told me that this approach was in fact the most effective one for trimming an antsy, squirmy 15-month-old.

Then I started to think of all the things that would have turned my stomach and my nose up before I had children, which now does nothing but gives me joy for having been productive.

Confessions of an MBA Turned Mama

Confessions of a Mama

Here are a few other examples:

  1. I am on my hands and knees, picking up the play area, when I come upon a semi-stale piece of rice cake. The trash can is on the other side of the house. I quickly pop the crumb in my mouth and grab my toddler, who is about to sprint off the side of the couch.
  2. I have two seconds to use the bathroom. Do I take the training seat off the toilet? Nope. Not this time. Maybe if the boys were asleep and I could lock or close the door.
  3. My son needs to be fed, well, wait, he won’t stop breastfeeding. I have to pee. Do I pop him off and leave him crying on the floor, or allow him to continue his pleasant feeding experience and simultaneously find a way to go to the bathroom with him on my lap? Yup. You guessed it. The latter…
  4. I have a choice: Eat or Shower. I choose Pinterest.
  5. One hoodie sweatshirt has yogurt smeared on the right shoulder. The other hoodie sweatshirt has a soggy cheerio stuck in the hem. Wear one. Throw the other back to wear on another day. Easy.
  6. You made mac and cheese for the kids out of the pot for dinner? Sure, why dirty another dish?
  7. Said toddler needs a Kleenex. You don’t have one. The sleeve works better.
  8. High five for going poopy in the potty? You betchya!

Please tell me I am not alone.

XX,
Marnie

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