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How to Teach Kids to Be Kind in a Tough World


Learn an easy Montessori kindness activity for kids! Perfect for all year round or even better for Valentine’s Day!

“See, J?” I quickly responded to my three-year-old after the milk he was balancing ended up spilling on the countertop.

“No, I don’t see, mom,” he replied with a hint of sass. I glanced over my right shoulder and noticed him sitting with his eyes shut.

Concrete to abstract.

That is how kids learn best. When children are young, they need visuals, and they need concrete, which makes teaching the “softer” lessons in life a bit more challenging. I am always searching for ways to teach these hugely important lessons.

Related Read: Yes, you can Teach Kindness to Kids!

This post examines how to teach kindness to kids, including a simple, hands-on, concrete activity to add to your daily routine.

Learn a fun, easy, and calm kindness activity for kids.

Above most qualities in life, I want my children to be kind. I want to raise thoughtful, good, gracious, productive, kind individuals. I believe happiness and joy will come to my children from those qualities. Success, too.


We live in a fast-paced world. Children, for the most part, have (and get) what they need (and want) immediately. There is no delayed gratification. I am guilty. I want to give my children everything. I genuinely do, but not at the expense of being unaware of how the rest of the world lives and the right way to treat people.


You can teach kindness to kids.

I trust that they feel gratitude, even though at 3 and 5, they may not be able to express this gratitude naturally (or maybe they do, but we adults need to pay closer attention?), for what we have as a family. I hope they want to be kind because that is the right thing to do.

How to Teach Kindness to Kids with a Kindness Activity with a Jar and PomPoms

How do we teach kindness to children?

Is it even possible?

I don’t know the answer to that question. I know that children pay close attention to what adults say and how we adults act. I also know that helping a child develop empathy towards others is an important part of being a caretaker.

Why Teach Kindness?

Social and emotional intelligence comes more easily to some than to others. Still, regardless, these intelligences are just as important to nurture (maybe even more so) than fine motor, language, and math skills.

Learn a fun, easy, and calm kindness activity for kids.

“Educating the mind without educating the heart is no education at all.” ~ Aristotle

I wanted a concrete way to integrate this learning into our daily routine seamlessly. The below activity is a simple way I could figure out how to teach kindness to my children. I hope you enjoy and are inspired by it.

An Easy Kindness Activity for Kids

How to Teach Kindness to Children Activity

Montessori Kindness Activity – Materials

  • Mason Jar
  • Various Sized Red Pom Poms

I chose red pom poms to represent love and the heart in three different sizes. My children were keen on the different sizes. If a larger pompom landed in the jar, a big act of kindness must have happened, and this alone piqued their interest and a conversation about what it means to be kind. 

Learn a fun, easy, and calm kindness activity for kids - Kindness Jar.

If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion. ~Dalai Lama

Learn the Kindness Activity Approach

  • Ask the child what it means to be kind and give an example of an act of kindness
  • Introduce the “kindness jar” to the child
  • Explain that you will be adding pom poms as you notice kind acts throughout the day and weeks
  • Together, come up with a fun celebration once your jar is full of kindness
  • Explain that you must notice the act and not have it pointed out to you (my boys love to let me know when they have done something nice)
  • Let the child know that he may also add pom poms to the jar if he notices kindness in your home
  • Continue the discussion at mealtime by asking questions such as “was someone kind to you today?” “did you help someone today?” This simple act of asking questions stimulates a child to think about kindness and how it impacted his day for better or for worse.

Learn a fun, easy, and calm kindness activity for kids.

Kindness is one of those qualities in life that has a much bigger impact in the grander scheme of life than most of us realize. A simple smile could make or break a stranger’s day.

A phone call to a relative.

A handwritten note in the mail.  

Hold the door for someone.

So Simple.

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