I am not alone in admitting that yelling is a natural instinct when my blood begins to boil and my children push all the right buttons. The thing is that yelling never makes me feel better and it certainly isn't effective at making my child behave any better.
So, I work EVERY SINGLE DAY to not yell. Like I said, not yelling does not come easy to me. I have to work hard at it. I have to practice. I compiled a list to remind myself of ways to avoid yelling at my children. Below I share the list of ways to help us stop yelling.
13 Ways to Help Parents to Stop Yelling
#1 – Remember that your child loves you
#2 Enforce boundaries by using the phrase “I won't let you…” or “I can't let you…”. I have found this approach makes me more objective when “disciplining” my children.
#3 – Connect by moving physically closer to the child or children, get down to their level, and look them in the eye
#4 – Use a visual for yourself and your child as Amanda from Messy Motherhood describes in her post
#5 – Anticipate the tantrum or meltdown so you can be more emotionally prepared to stay calm and cool
#6 – Identify your anger triggers. Amanda from Messy Motherhood walks us through one way to become aware of your anger triggers.
#7 – Use Put Ups like Alissa from Creative with Kids explains so well
#8 – Acknowledge the emotion
#9 – Make observational statements, or sportscast a la Magda Gerber and the RIE approach. Teacher Tom's recent post on Sportscasting is wonderful.
#10 – Don't take your child's behavior, or harsh words, personally
#11 – Deep breath, close your eyes, & recite a mantra
#12 – Make a family commitment
#13 Use your eyes to communicate as the signal to the child